Emotional Health
Stress as a Self-Enhancing Process
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admin 18 September, 2008
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The emotions, the division of attention and the excitement accompanying stress at the workplace make it harder to deal with our work appropriately. Stress reactions usually are seen as inappropriate or abnormal. They can interfere with the normal way of affairs and evoke disapproval, irritation and avoidance among colleagues. This can make it more difficult to keep our attention on our work. In addition, stress reactions do not tend to take away the stress causes. Lastly, we try to suppress these reactions as much as possible, which implies an additional attack on our available mental resources. All in all, stress reactions only make it more difficult to keep our attention on our work. Apparently, stress reactions are not only effects of stress, but can also be causes of stress: stress processes tend to enhance themselves.
All this does not make one happy. However, we should realise that here the most unrestrained forms of a stress process have been discussed. Then again, stress is not an incurable illness that has to run its course. Stress is a choice.
Categories : Emotional Health, Mood Disorders
WHAT IS STRESS?
Posted by
admin 18 September, 2008
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Stress evolves when we must do something that we are not able and/or willing to do.
In a work context, this is related to the appropriateness of the work and its environment; that is, the degree to which they allow us to attend to the work and be involved in the work. In everyday practice, this appropriateness is a kind of middle zone. In general, it can be stated that a work environment that makes it too hard to keep our attention to the work leads to stress. The middle zone of the work itself can be described as an appropriate degree of challenge.
Work that becomes too challenging demands more knowledge, skills and abilities than we can mobilise. It becomes impossible to deal with the task in a systematic and orderly way. Chaos takes over, our involvement vanishes and task performance breaks down. As we lose control over our task performance, having to perform the task anyhow then becomes a serious stress source. This activates a primordial response pattern, which is only appropriate in situations that quickly demand intensive bodily activity, for examples in situations of life or death. In situations of a different kind, it can activate a lengthy vicious cycle, which affects our effectiveness, motivation and creativity. It can also isolate us and violate our well-being and health.
On the other hand, work that offers too little challenge to keep us involved, while we must do it anyhow, demands from us that we force ourselves to stay involved. This soon becomes very tiring and we can go on in this way only for a limited time. Our attention wanders. We become bored and drowsy, and sometimes somewhat irritated. The work becomes less and less manageable, and this too can give rise to stress.
Categories : Emotional Health, Mood Disorders
Dealing with End-of-Life Decisions
Posted by
admin 12 August, 2008
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Over the course of a lifetime, men face a variety of inevitable stresses that create emotional responses. Dealing with death and dying presents some of life’s greatest emotional stress. There are two ways in which a man finds himself confronting the issues surrounding death and dying: as someone caring for a dying person, most often a parent, and as someone who is facing his own death. In both roles he must find ways to deal with his grief. Grief affects each person differently but typically involves four stages—shock, denial, depression and withdrawal, and acceptance. If you are grieving, it is important for your emotional health to talk about your feelings—to a family member or a close friend, to others in a support group, or to a counselor. “Bottled up” emotions can lead to depression, withdrawal from friends and society, sudden irrational outbursts, feelings of anger and resentment, insomnia, and even physical illness. Here are some positive steps you can take to deal with grief:
• Rest, eat a healthy diet, and keep warm (emotional stress will make your body temperature drop). Avoid caffeine and alcohol because they can add to your stress.
• Use relaxation techniques. Try deep breathing. People who are under stress tend to hold their breath or to breathe shallowly, which can cause fatigue and anxiety.
• Express your feelings. Talk to family, friends, members of a support group, or clergy.
• Accept help. Let others care for you. Let your friends and family make a meal for you, do some housework, or just listen to you. Such support can be healing for them as well as for you.
• Take as much time as you need. Grieving has no time frame.
• Think about how your life has changed and what that means for the future.
Family Caregiving
A large part of the stress related to the dying of family members has to do with the challenges of providing care. People who have a terminal illness usually have important and wide-ranging needs for assistance in addition to the medical care they receive from physicians and other healthcare workers. A majority of people who are dying require home nursing care, help with transportation, homemaking services, and personal care. In many cases their families must take on the substantial burden of caring for them. In some cases, home healthcare programs may help. Traditionally, women have provided most of the home care, even when the family member is the man’s parent or grandparent. But today, with most women working outside the home, men and members of religious or civic organizations have an opportunity to be more actively engaged in caring for the dying. People are relying increasingly on paid workers to provide the nonmedical care needed by family members who are dying.
Hospice Care
Hospice care is a life-affirming approach to caring for people who are in the final phase of a terminal illness. Hospice regards death as a natural part of life, and emphasizes the comfort and quality of life of a dying person. The focus is on relieving pain and controlling other symptoms. With hospice care, a dying person is allowed to live his or her last days with dignity, pain-free and alert, surrounded by loved ones at home or in a homelike setting.
In general, a person becomes eligible to enter a hospice program when a doctor has determined that he or she has 6 months or less to live and refers him or her to a hospice program. Family members, friends, clergy, or healthcare professionals also can make referrals.
Under the supervision of a doctor, an interdisciplinary team—doctors, nurses, therapists, counselors, social workers, clergy, healthcare aides, and volunteers— works closely with the dying person to provide medical care and support. The team deals with the person’s medical, emotional, and spiritual needs. And because the entire family is regarded as the “unit of care,” the hospice team also provides support and assistance to the person’s loved ones. Members of the hospice team are available to assist the person and his or her loved ones 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. After the person has died, the hospice program also provides grief counseling to the survivors.
Advance Directives
When a person becomes seriously ill and is no longer able to make decisions about his or her healthcare, those decisions are usually made by a close family member or by the person’s doctor. Advance directives are legal documents designed to help ensure that healthcare decisions made on a person’s behalf are consistent with his or her preferences. Advance directives may provide either general guidelines or specific instructions.
Although advance directives do not go into effect until the person is unable to make his or her own healthcare decisions, the forms should be prepared and signed long before they are needed. When the person is in a hospital or a nursing home, emotional factors may make it challenging to talk about the forms (and the issues involved). These documents should be reviewed and updated regularly. The person can revise or withdraw his or her advance directives at any time.
Advance directive forms are available through hospital social service departments and from state or local medical societies and bar associations, or you can consult a lawyer to produce your own living will and durable power of attorney for healthcare. Because requirements for advance directives vary from state to state, you should consider talking to a lawyer when preparing or filling out these documents.
Be sure to tell the doctor and the person you have chosen to make your healthcare decisions about your advance directives. Give each of them a copy, and keep a copy for yourself.
The most common types of advance directives are living wills, durable powers of attorney, do-not-resuscitate orders, and organ and tissue donor cards:
• A living will is a document that indicates a person’s wishes regarding life sustaining medical treatments. It is prepared by a competent person and goes into effect only when the person is unable to speak for himself or herself. A living will guides medical professionals and family members so they can make healthcare decisions that are consistent with the person’s beliefs. A living will can be revised or withdrawn by the person at any time. You should consult a lawyer when preparing a living will because legal requirements vary from state to state.
• A durable power of attorney for healthcare is a document in which a competent person gives another person (called a healthcare proxy) the power to make healthcare decisions for him or her. It goes into effect only in the event that the person is unable to make such decisions. The durable power of attorney can be withdrawn by the person who initiated it at any time.
• A do-not-resuscitate (DNR) order states that no one should perform heroic measures, including CPR and the use of mechanical life support equipment, to restart a person’s heart should it stop. The document must be signed by the person if he or she is competent (or by his or her healthcare proxy if he or she is not competent) and by his or her doctor. In some cases, doctors recommend that people wear a special bracelet or necklace that communicates their DNR status to emergency responders. The person should keep a copy of the document in his or her home in a prominent place where it will be noticed by emergency medical personnel called to the home; the doctor should keep a copy in the person’s medical records at all times to make sure that the person’s wishes are respected. DNR orders can be withdrawn at any time by the patient, as long as he or she is competent.
• An organ and tissue donor card informs medical personnel that your organs and tissues may be used for transplant in the event of your death. Many states provide an opportunity to register as an organ and tissue donor when you apply for a driver’s license or state identification card. Your donor status is then indicated on the license or identification card. Be sure to tell your loved ones that you are a registered donor.
Categories : Emotional Health
Elder Abuse
Posted by
admin 11 August, 2008
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Abuse and neglect of older people can involve physical abuse, verbal intimidation, exploitation (such as mishandling of financial resources), medical neglect (such as withholding medications or treatment or devices such as dentures, eyeglasses, hearing aids, or walkers), or physical neglect or abandonment. Most abused older people are women, but men also are abused. Victims of elder abuse usually live with their abuser.
Watch for the following signs of possible abuse in older friends and family members:
Physical or emotional abuse:
• unexplained burns, bruises, cuts, or scars
• frequent falls
• noticeable fear of caregiver
• withdrawal; isolation
• lack of responsiveness
• agitation; anxiety
• confusion; disorientation
• depression
• anger
• poor hygiene
• bedsores
• unexplained weight loss
• lethargy
• changes in personality
Signs of financial exploitation:
• mismanagement of the person’s assets
• diversion of the person’s income
• withdrawal of funds without the person’s permission
• withdrawal of funds against the person’s will
If you suspect that an older friend, relative, or neighbor is being abused or exploited, try to help him or her. Stay in touch with the person. If you have not seen him or her recently and cannot reach him or her by phone, stop by unexpectedly. If you are not allowed to see the person, ask about his or her health and stop by again within a day or two. Keep trying. If your persistent attempts to see the person fail or if, when you see the person, you suspect that there is a problem, consider reporting the situation to the local protective services agency. A local senior center or senior citizens’ agency can tell you where to call for help. Be prepared to provide the person’s name and address, the nature of the suspected problem, the names of other people who may know about the situation, and how best to contact the person. Your identity will be kept confidential.
Categories : Emotional Health
Child Abuse
Posted by
admin 11 August, 2008
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Child abuse includes neglect, physical abuse, emotional abuse, and sexual abuse. Girls are more likely to be sexually abused than boys. Child abuse occurs in all racial, ethnic, educational, and socioeconomic groups. The abuser is usually someone who provides care for the child—such as a biological parent, adoptive parent, foster parent, grandparent, sibling, other relative, or a friend or neighbor.
Child abuse can have serious, long-term consequences for a child. Children who are abused or who live in violent homes are more likely to see violence as an effective solution to problems. The majority of child abusers were abused or neglected when they were children.
Signs of possible child abuse include the following:
• repeated injuries with unconvincing explanations of the cause
• injuries that leave scars that resemble cigarette burns or marks from an electrical cord, especially in areas of the body that are very sensitive, such as the genitals, nipples, and face
• behavior problems—behavior that is either passive and withdrawn, or hyperactive and aggressive
• reluctance to respond or fear when asked about life at home
• self-destructive, delinquent, or reckless behaviors such as substance abuse, crime, or running away from home
• low self-esteem
• learning problems and lack of motivation in school
• neglected appearance
• no desire to make friends or invite other children home
• depression
• suicide attempts
If you think that a child you know may be a victim of abuse, do not directly confront the suspected abuser. Contact a local service agency such as a child protective service agency, welfare department or social service agency, public health department, or the police—they can assist the child and the family.
If you are abusing your child or think you may be at risk for doing so, talk to your doctor or a clergy member, or join a support group of people with similar concerns. Many communities have intervention and prevention programs to help you learn positive coping and parenting skills.
Signs of possible sexual abuse include the following:
• bruising, redness, swelling, discharge, or other signs of injury in the rectal or genital area
• regressive behavior such as bed-wetting, thumb-sucking, or excessive clinging
• frequent nightmares or fearfulness
• an increase in hostile or aggressive behavior
• withdrawal from friends, family, or school activities
• provocative, promiscuous, or sexually precocious behavior
Teach your children the difference between good touching and bad touching. A friendly hug or a pat on the back are examples of good touching. Feeling private parts (areas covered by a bathing suit) and touching (including rubbing or kissing) anywhere on their body that makes them feel uncomfortable are examples of bad touching. Make sure that your children know that their body is private and that no one may touch them without their permission.
If you suspect that your child may have been sexually abused, get help immediately. Call your pediatrician or contact the police, a social worker, or a school guidance counselor. Do not hesitate to contact local authorities. Most sex offenders have abused more than one child. Stopping a sex offender will prevent the sexual abuse of other children.
Categories : Emotional Health
Could You Be a Batterer?
Posted by
admin 11 August, 2008
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Early signs of domestic abuse can be subtle, progressing gradually from overly controlling behavior to threats, and, ultimately, to violence. If you think you may have a problem with violence, consider the following:
• Do you imagine that another person is interested in your partner or that your partner is interested in another person?
• Do you abuse your partner verbally? Do you ridicule your partner or use disparaging terms such as “stupid,” “fat,” “lazy,” or “ugly”?
• Are you unusually concerned with your partner’s whereabouts, activities, and contacts with friends and family?
• Do you threaten to do something violent if your partner does something you don’t like?
• When you are angry, do you throw things, damage your partner’s possessions, or threaten to hurt your partner or your partner’s pets or children?
• Do you use force such as pushing, shoving, or restraining during an argument?
• Do you blame your partner for your anger or violence?
• After a violent episode, do you promise your partner that it won’t happen again, say you love your partner, or buy your partner gifts, but repeat the behavior another day?
If you answered “yes” to one or more of the above questions, you are a potential batterer. Denying that you have a problem or rationalizing your behavior puts you and your loved ones at risk of escalating violence that may lead to injury or even death. It’s not enough to say you are sorry and you will never do it again; that is part of the cycle of violence. It is crucial for you to recognize your abusive behavior and take responsibility for it. Before you react, think about the safety, health, and emotional well-being of your partner and children.
Call your doctor or a domestic violence hot line and find out what programs are available in your community. Your doctor may refer you to a mental health professional who can help you understand the reasons for your behavior and help you develop strategies to change it and break the pattern of abuse. Joining a support group of other men who have a similar experience also can be helpful.
Categories : Emotional Health, Tips and Advices
Help Stop the Violence
Posted by
admin 11 August, 2008
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You can play an important role in helping to stop domestic violence in your community. Domestic violence is not an issue just for women. Family violence is everyone’s concern. It’s essential for men to get involved. Men are vital to violence-prevention efforts because men are more likely to open up to other men if they have a problem, and they are more likely to listen to advice from men. In addition, fathers have enormous influence over their children’s developing attitudes and behavior.
There are many different ways, including the following, in which you can contribute to making your community a safe place to live:
• Speak out against domestic violence. Take a leadership role in community organizations such as sports clubs, churches, and neighborhood associations, and take a stand against domestic violence.
• Be a role model for other men. Reach out to men who are violent at home, and let them know that their behavior is not acceptable and that you want to help them break the pattern of abuse.
• Be a role model for your son. Show kindness and respect to your partner and you will give your son an example of a healthy, nurturing relationship.
• Be a role model for a child who lacks a positive male figure in his life. A male
mentor and friend can provide consistent, positive support to help ensure that
a child does not grow up to be a batterer.
• Reach out to a family that is involved in violence. Talk to family members
about what is happening, and offer to help them. Follow through on your offer.
Categories : Emotional Health, Tips and Advices
Domestic Violence
Posted by
admin 11 August, 2008
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Domestic violence—also known as battering, spouse abuse, or partner abuse— is a pattern of psychological, economic, or sexual force used by one person in a relationship against the other. It is characterized by recurrent verbal and physical assaults that tend to escalate over time and is the most common cause of injury to women who need emergency medical treatment. It is estimated that an act of domestic violence occurs every 15 seconds somewhere in the United States. This translates to more than 2.5 million victims of domestic violence each year. Domestic violence occurs in all ethnic, racial, educational, and socioeconomic groups.
The targets of domestic violence are usually women and their children. More than 90 percent of family violence cases in the United States involve women being abused by men. Six in every 10 women who are victims of homicide were murdered by someone they knew. About half of these women were murdered by a spouse or someone with whom they had been intimate. Men who commit domestic violence may be a spouse, a former spouse, a fiancé, or a boyfriend.
Children are involved in about 60 percent of domestic violence incidents. During assaults on their mothers, the children of battered women are at risk for injury themselves, either deliberate or incidental. One in 10 calls made to alert police to domestic abuse is placed by a child in the home. More than 53 percent of male abusers also beat their children. The self-perpetuating aspect of domestic violence can be seen in the fact that one of every three abused children becomes an adult abuser or victim.
Domestic violence has long-term effects on the lives of the victims as well as any children who live in the home. It may take years for the woman to become disentangled from the abusive relationship, during which time the level of abuse can increase. Attempts to escape often escalate the violence.
Domestic violence can take many forms. It usually falls into one or more of the following categories:
• Physical battering. The abuser’s physical attacks or aggressive behavior can include grabbing, pinching, slapping, punching, hair-pulling, kicking, biting, restraining, or choking; destroying furniture or personal possessions; injuring pets; and murder.
• Psychological battering. This type of violence can include cursing, shouting or verbal abuse, implicit or direct threats of bodily harm, uninvited visits, stalking, malicious telephone calls or letters, throwing things, blocking a doorway passage, cornering the victim during an argument, possessiveness, embarrassing the victim in public, restricting telephone use and isolating the victim from friends and family, forbidding use of the family car, withholding money or health insurance, refusing to pay bills, and sabotaging the victim’s attempts to work or to go to school.
• Sexual abuse. Physical attacks by the abuser are often accompanied by, or culminate in, sexual violence in which the victim is forced to take part in a sexual activity.
Battering is viewed as a set of learned controlling behaviors and the feeling of being trapped in a relationship. The batterer may find that violence is an effective method for gaining and keeping control over another person, and he often does not experience adverse consequences as a result of his behavior. Historically, violence against women has often not been treated as a “real” crime. There is no distinct personality or socioeconomic profile for men who commit domestic violence. Many batterers have no history of a mental health condition or a criminal record. Batterers come from all groups and backgrounds and have different personality profiles.
Categories : Emotional Health
Family Violence
Posted by
admin 11 August, 2008
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Family or domestic violence is emotional, physical, or sexual abuse committed by a spouse, former spouse, partner, parent, roommate, or other person living in the home. Domestic violence also includes emotional, physical, or sexual abuse of children, abuse of parents or grandparents, violence toward a partner of the same sex, and even date violence and date rape. Family violence is a rapidly growing public health problem that affects more than 2.5 million Americans— mainly women and children—each year.
Many theories exist that attempt to explain why men use violence against their partner, including deficient communication skills, provocation by the partner, stress, and financial hardship. While these factors may provoke an isolated incident of violence, they do not adequately explain the man’s motivation. The main reason why men commit violent acts within the family is because they see violence as the best way to gain and keep control over other people without experiencing negative consequences. Many violent men have firm and inflexible ideas about traditional male and female roles and hold a distorted concept of manhood.
Violent men typically have grown up in a violent family, in which they learned that violence is a “normal” response to solving problems. They may have been victims of violence as children or watched one parent beat the other. Violent men often have a quick temper and overreact to frustration. There is a strong link between violence and alcohol or other drug abuse. Poverty and lacking at least a high school education are contributing factors, although domestic violence appears in every social and economic group.
The effects of family violence extend far beyond the physical scars produced by the abuse. People who have been physically or sexually abused at home often experience long-lasting depression, panic attacks, sleep or eating disorders, or sexual problems. They may begin abusing alcohol or other drugs, become aggressive or neglectful, or attempt suicide. Children who witness or experience family violence are deeply affected and often grow up to become violent or aggressive themselves. Many people are afraid to leave their abuser because they fear what the abuser will do if they try to leave or think they may lose custody of their children. Others may have nowhere else to go or no money of their own.
Categories : Emotional Health
Blended Families
Posted by
admin 11 August, 2008
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A blended family, or stepfamily, includes a couple with one or more children from a previous relationship. Half of all people in the United States will experience a stepfamily relationship at some time in their lives—as a stepparent, remarried parent, or stepchild.
Children in blended families have strong emotional connections to a parent who lives in another household or to a parent who has died. In many cases, a child moves back and forth between two households that often have very different rules and expectations. This adjustment period can be even more stressful than a divorce or living in a single-parent home. Children may feel angry, anxious, or depressed and worry that they won’t be able to have as much contact with either parent.
Blended families in which both adults have children from previous relationships have the biggest problems to overcome. Children in these families may worry that their own parent will have less time to spend with them, that they will have to share their bedroom or possessions with a stepsibling they hardly know, or that their place in the family hierarchy will change. Rules and family routines may be different.
All these new experiences can put stress on a child. He or she may display his or her feelings through disruptive behavior, or perform poorly in school. Give your child time to adjust to the situation, to become familiar with the new family members, and to get used to the working structure of the household. Stepfamilies who work together to solve problems eventually find a living arrangement they can all be happy with. Once you make it through the difficult early years, you will probably find that being part of a stepfamily is an enriching, fulfilling experience.
Here are some tips for helping to make living in a stepfamily rewarding for everyone involved:
• Put a priority on the couple relationship; a secure relationship between the two adults is essential for a successful blended family. In many stepfamilies, couples spend so much time dealing with child issues that they don’t nurture their own relationship.
• Agree with your partner on a few important rules and spell them out to the children. Always support each other in front of the children.
• Be patient in establishing a relationship with a stepchild—it takes time. And be cautious when taking on a parenting role, especially with a teenager, who may never accept you as a parent. Your stepchildren are more likely to treat you with respect and courtesy if you treat them the same way.
• Supervision of children is especially important in a blended family, especially when their ages vary. It can be tempting for an older child to stretch the rules with a younger or smaller stepsibling when the two are left alone.
• Have regular family meetings to discuss the week’s activities or any problems that might come up. Open communication helps establish healthy relationships among all family members.
• Take most of the responsibility for disciplining your own child. Give the stepparent time to establish a trusting relationship with your child before beginning to set rules for him or her. Discipline all children in the household equally and fairly.
• Resolve any personal differences between a stepparent and a stepchild or between stepsiblings promptly and directly; unresolved problems tend to get worse over time.
• Set aside time for one-on-one activities between family members. Stepchildren need to spend time alone with their parent; stepparents should do things alone with stepchildren; and the two adults should spend time alone with each other.
• Participate in a support group for stepfamilies. You’ll see that you are not alone and can learn a lot from the experiences of other stepfamilies.
• If your children are part of their other parent’s stepfamily, support that family and cooperate with both of the adults involved. Competition and tension between two households can cause the children to suffer emotionally.
Categories : Emotional Health
