Archive for July, 2008
Young Adult Sexual Practices
The sexual behaviors and experiences of young men are quite varied. Studies of young adult sex practices provide yet another reference point for what men and women do, but be careful to not use these data as a standard for your sexual health. Data give averages, including healthy and unhealthy men, healthy and unhealthy motivations. Nevertheless, the numbers can give you a reference point for understanding your own sexual experiences.
Men have an average of 6 sexual partners in their lifetime; the range is zero to hundreds of partners. What do you think is healthy? Do you think it is healthy to have one sex partner in a lifetime? 6? 20? Is it healthy to have hundreds?
Sexual frequency for men is about 1–2 times a week. Again, this is an average with a range from rare (less than monthly is considered a sexless relationship) to three times a day (among new young couples). About one third have partner sex at least twice a week, a third have partner sex several times a month, and the other third have partner sex a few times a year or have no sex partner. Remember, sexual satisfaction is a function of sharing pleasure and being an intimate team rather than sexual frequency.
Experiencing a sexual dysfunction (like premature ejaculation) is statistically normal—most young men will begin as premature ejaculators or on occasion do not get an erection. Th e issue is how you deal with a sexual problem. If you panic and overreact, you will unintentionally set up subsequent performance pressures that will make the sexual problem more severe and chronic.
Physically healthy men will enjoy lifelong sexual function.
Healthy Step-by-Step Progressive Sexual Learnings
Gradually, children gain more experience and grow because of their curiosity about others, learn words for sexual body parts, discover selftouch, examine other children’s bodies, learn boundaries acceptable to the adult world, and gradually progress in the level of sensual–sexual experiences.
To grow from playfully holding hands with a girl at age 3 or 4 to “playing doctor” with a neighbor kid as a 6- or 7-year-old, to holding hands and kissing as a 10- or 12-year-old, to experimenting with breast fondling and genital touching as a 12- to 15-year-old refl ects a natural progression that is guided by the individual’s level of curiosity and comfort. When this progression proceeds with the self-determined readiness and age-appropriate spontaneity of the child and adolescent, sexual health is facilitated (Brady & Levitt, 1965). Should this sequence be interrupted or experienced out of sequence (such as in childhood sex abuse), a boy’s sexual development can be disrupted, fueled by internal sexual confl icts and broken trust in adults.
The Importance of Adult Reactions
Because so much of childhood sexual behavior is normal exploration, an important dimension of learning sexual health as a boy is the reaction of important adults to the sex behavior. In your life, do you remember parents reacting in a positive but direct way when you were publicly touching your penis? Did they calmly teach you, “Touching yourself feels good, doesn’t it, but you should only do this at home, in private.” Or did they react with shock and disgust? “Oh! Don’t ever do that again!” When adults are positive, calm, and clear about sexual boundaries, kids learn healthy messages and boundaries. If this positive approach was your prominent experience growing up, appreciate your parents’ wisdom. If not, it is now your job as a man to develop healthier beliefs, feelings, and behaviors—and to be a sex educator with your own children.
Observed Childhood Sexual Behaviors
- Touches genitals when in public places
- Masturbates with hand
- Draws genitals when drawing pictures of people
- Touches or tries to touch women’s breasts (e.g., mother, aunt)
- Masturbates with toy or object (blanket, pillow, plastic toy)
- Touches another child’s genitals
- Touches genitals at home
- Touches animal’s genitals or nipples
- Makes sexual sounds (sighs, moans, heavy breathing, etc.)
- Rubs body or genitals against people or furniture
- Tries to look at people when they are nude or undressing
- Pretends that dolls or stuff ed animals are having sex
- Shows genitals to adults
- Dresses like the opposite sex
- Stands too close to people
- Tries to look at pictures of nude or partially dressed people
- Talks about genitals
- Kisses and hugs other children they do not know well
- Shows genitals to other children
- Is very interested in the opposite sex
- Puts his mouth on mother’s or other women’s breasts
Why should you stop smoking?
From what most people who quit smoking suggest, they have given up their habit to create better lifestyle opportunities for themselves and others - improve their sex lives, attract the opposite sex or reduce any potential harm on someone else’s health.
Many estimates and current research suggest that non smokers live ten years longer than smokers do.
Smoking is renowned for causing many diseases such as lung cancer, bronchitis and heart disease, as well as strokes, bronchitis, stomach ulcers, leukaemia and other cancer related conditions.
Also, it has been suggested that smoking has the capacity to worsen chest problems, allergies and colds. When involved in exercise, people who smoke also may feel short of breath, are prone to coughing and might sneeze more.
Smoking has also been linked to cellulite and is not able to make you lose weight. I you want to lose weight, there are far safer measures available to you.
Second hand smoke or passive smoking is also linked to cancer. Children who are passive smokers are more prone to croup, pneumonia bronchitis, ear infections, tonsillitis, wheezing and childhood asthma.
Also, pregnant mothers who smoke are exposing their baby’s health to harmful gases and chemicals.
Benefits of exercising
1. Boost to your emotional well being – Even light exercise can help boost your mood. Also, more intense exercise can stimulate the release of mood elevating compounds called endorphins.
2. Reduce risk of heart disease – If you are overweight or obese, you are more prone to heart disease, as you have a higher risk of cardiovascular disease. You can improve your cardiovascular function if you partake in exercise.
3. Improvement to memory – If you exercise more regularly, you move blood and oxygen to all your body’s organs, including the brain, which is great for revitalising your mind.
4. Reduced risk of Diabetes – Physically active people are less likely to develop Diabetes, as exercise increases the body’s ability to use sugar for energy and thereby decreases the need for insulin.
5. Other benefits include: - Improved sleep pattern, increased strength, improved energy level, pain relief, longevity and increased bone density.
Calories and Weight
Healthy diet explained:
- Try to have plenty of starchy foods such as rice, bread, pasta, potatoes, breakfast cereals, yams and sweet potatoes. Always try to go for the wholemeal variety in these foods where possible
- Aim to have five portions of a variety of fruit and vegetables daily
- Use a moderate amount of dairy product and look for low fat varieties
- Moderate amount of meat, fish or alternatives such as eggs, beans, peas and lentils - look for lower fat versions where possible
- The occasional treat (foods that are higher in fat, salt and/or added sugar should only be eaten in moderation)
- Little salt - always read the label
What Is Natural and Healthy Sexual Behavior for Children?
Sex Behaviors of 6- to 12-Year-Old Boys
Similar to boys, girls’ overt sexual behaviors decline. Girls aged 6–9 (a) touched their vagina or anus at home (21%) as well as (b) tried to look at people when they were nude or undressing (21%). When 10–12 years old, they, like the boys, were observed to be very interested in the opposite sex (29%).
These data show that boys and girls are sexual individuals, that their public sexual behaviors decline from toddlerhood to puberty, and that during these years, children are learning the values and boundaries of the family and community.
Studies of children 0–11 years old in Europe also confirm the sexual curiosity and behaviors of boys and girls. Perhaps because some European societies are more sexually open and accepting, studies report more sexual behaviors than in the United States. For example, “touching breasts” is reported for 42% of U.S. boys (and girls); in Spain, 63% (Lopez Sanchez, Del Campo, & Guijo, 2002); in Sweden, 68% (Larsson & Svedin, 2002); and in the Netherlands, 74% (Sandfort & Cohen-Kettenis, 2000).
